Lex and Matt discuss Madonna’s meltdown over missing her son, Adam LaRoche’s retirement from the Chicago White Sox because they wouldn’t allow his son in the clubhouse all season long, and Charlie Sheen’s seven-figure child support requirement. Then you can finish nursing that St. Patty’s hangover as they talk about the WNBA, Sean Penn, El Chapo, drugs, Mariah Carey, more drugs, and the ethical and moral implications of barbering with regard to transsexual customers.

Who in the hell would hire a bearded woman as a model? What’s the latest with Charlie Sheen, Brett Rossi, and HIV? And is any black actress truly “black enough?” Lex and Matt are back from a break to answer all these pressing questions, and talk about Kesha’s Dr. Luke rape allegations, Caitlin Jenner preferring men, Blac Chyna’s effect on Rob Kardashian’s fitness, and whether Eva Amurri’s husband declining sex with their nanny is really something to brag about.

It seems every award show is just piling on the blackness ever since the Oscar nominees were announced, but that unfortunately means we have to talk about Kanye West more. Lex and Matt are back to nail these issues from both sides, plus the Sports Illustrated XL Swimsuit Issue, Gwyneth Paltrow’s super exclusive club, Ted Cruz firing a porn star, and #AdidasSoGay

Peyton Manning says “this Bud’s for me,” after winning Super Bowl 50, after Beyonce shouts out to #BlackLivesMatter and the Black Panthers at the Halftime Show (does anyone still even watch that?). Lex and Matt break it all down, plus Chelsea Handler’s tits, the sexist implications of not voting for Hillary Clinton and what she means for other people named Hillary, Casey Anthony’s new business, Lily Rose Depp’s old sexual orientation, and George Clooney’s all-white films’ effect on black acting opportunities in Hollywood.

Who knew Kanye’s ultimate weakness was assplay? Is high school wrestling the gayest sport ever invented? And is #SAGawardsSoBlack just a lazy, pandering repsonse to #OscarsSoWhite, or an actual victory for acceptance? Lex and Matt establish a firm grip on these topics, plus an Australian rape club, Charlie Sheen’s Mexican HIV medicine, reverse psychology in alcohol advertising, Blac Chyna’s airport antics, and finally they “react” to the Fine Brothers’ asinine trademark application.

How screwed up is Hollywood these days? The Academy announces affirmative action for their membership, straight celebrities are posing as gay couples for photos, and apparently no black baby is safe from a famous adoptive parent! Special guest Pete Giovine joins Lex and Matt to talk about this, as well as Amy Schumer’s joke ripoff allegations, the Buffalo Bills hiring the NFL’s first female assistant coach, Larry Flynt vs. Hef, sexual double standards regarding student/teacher bangings, and a HuffPo editor saying #WhiteBooksDontMatter.

Why can’t male teenage film bloggers make sexually suggestive jokes involving Amy Schumer when such jokes are basically her entire act? Is a memoir just a pretentious way of saying “autobiography,” and should we require that their authors are, well, notable? Lex Jurgen and Matt Ralston tackle these tough questions and discuss the whiteness of The Oscars, Tila Tequila’s GoFundMe campaign (and the size of her tits), tennis corruption, whether or not Khloe Kardashian is retarded, yet another “gay” teen actress, and Neil Patrick Harris’s bench theft.

Well, none of us won the huge Powerball jackpot, so we’re kicking off the new year with a ridiculous new episode. Lex and Matt discuss the merits of lotteries like Powerball, plus-size lingerie modeling, Sean Penn’s interview with El Chapo, David Bowie groupgrief, and the Playboy Mansion being up for sale (under condition that Hugh Hefner will still live there).

How can The Edge (from U2) claim to be an environmentalist while building five mansions in Malibu? Has Wu-Tang Clan’s $2 million album stunt reached its perfect conclusion with Martin “Pharma Bro” Shkreli buying it? And does Ronda Rousey care about body image stigmas or is she just letting herself go after her first UFC loss? Lex and Matt absolutely deliver on this final episode of the Fall season with all these hot topics, plus Sikhs being mistaken for Muslims, Ben Affleck’s back tat, renaming racist stadiums, and how nobody can stop Donald Trump.

Lex and Matt finished nursing their Thanksgiving hangovers just in time to discuss some important topics, like the 43rd Pirelli Calendar getting all serious and sophisticated, Kobe Bryant’s poetry, Sinead O’Connor’s fake Facebook suicide, Bernie Sanders porn, porn star James Deen’s rape accusations, and apparently The Hulk is a Korean teen now. Lex gets his panties in a bunch over calling Muslim terrorists Muslims, and if that wasn’t enough religious extremism for you, Tim Tebow’s girlfriend dumped him for refusing to have sex with her.