How screwed up is Hollywood these days? The Academy announces affirmative action for their membership, straight celebrities are posing as gay couples for photos, and apparently no black baby is safe from a famous adoptive parent! Special guest Pete Giovine joins Lex and Matt to talk about this, as well as Amy Schumer’s joke ripoff allegations, the Buffalo Bills hiring the NFL’s first female assistant coach, Larry Flynt vs. Hef, sexual double standards regarding student/teacher bangings, and a HuffPo editor saying #WhiteBooksDontMatter.

Why can’t male teenage film bloggers make sexually suggestive jokes involving Amy Schumer when such jokes are basically her entire act? Is a memoir just a pretentious way of saying “autobiography,” and should we require that their authors are, well, notable? Lex Jurgen and Matt Ralston tackle these tough questions and discuss the whiteness of The Oscars, Tila Tequila’s GoFundMe campaign (and the size of her tits), tennis corruption, whether or not Khloe Kardashian is retarded, yet another “gay” teen actress, and Neil Patrick Harris’s bench theft.

Well, none of us won the huge Powerball jackpot, so we’re kicking off the new year with a ridiculous new episode. Lex and Matt discuss the merits of lotteries like Powerball, plus-size lingerie modeling, Sean Penn’s interview with El Chapo, David Bowie groupgrief, and the Playboy Mansion being up for sale (under condition that Hugh Hefner will still live there).

How can The Edge (from U2) claim to be an environmentalist while building five mansions in Malibu? Has Wu-Tang Clan’s $2 million album stunt reached its perfect conclusion with Martin “Pharma Bro” Shkreli buying it? And does Ronda Rousey care about body image stigmas or is she just letting herself go after her first UFC loss? Lex and Matt absolutely deliver on this final episode of the Fall season with all these hot topics, plus Sikhs being mistaken for Muslims, Ben Affleck’s back tat, renaming racist stadiums, and how nobody can stop Donald Trump.

Lex and Matt finished nursing their Thanksgiving hangovers just in time to discuss some important topics, like the 43rd Pirelli Calendar getting all serious and sophisticated, Kobe Bryant’s poetry, Sinead O’Connor’s fake Facebook suicide, Bernie Sanders porn, porn star James Deen’s rape accusations, and apparently The Hulk is a Korean teen now. Lex gets his panties in a bunch over calling Muslim terrorists Muslims, and if that wasn’t enough religious extremism for you, Tim Tebow’s girlfriend dumped him for refusing to have sex with her.

I guess the only thing odd about Charlie Sheen having HIV is the fact that he went on The Today Show to announce it. But could you imagine if he just wrote that on a restaurant receipt where the tip is supposed to go, just like other people do to shock their servers and whoever else sees it once it goes, well, y’know…viral? And it’s hard enough being a widower of a 9/11 first responder, but then Glamour Magazine had to go and give the same Woman of the Year award to some transsexual named Caitlyn Jenner, so James Smith basically had no choice but to posthumously return his wife Moira’s award, right? Lex and Matt are back to talk about these intense topics, along with the ridiculousness of whiny college kids wanting to feel safe from even the most laser-specific “triggers” and “microaggressions” while in school, the latest on Lamar Odom and Khloe and the rest of the Kardashians, and this age of misinformation and #slacktivism on social media. Plus, Matt reveals that he’s in a Twitter war with rapper 2 Chainz regarding his threatening lyrics and tweets toward a certain female fan. Also, mark November 17, 2020 down in your calendars, because Matt has officially set the over-under on Charlie Sheen’s inevitable death at five years.

Jeff Richards is our special guest this week as he and Matt Ralston try to pass Lex Jurgen’s Big Gay Quiz! They also discuss the recent spat between Vivica A. Fox and 50 Cent, and whether or not Fiddy’s claim that she licked his asshole is actually a gay comeback to gay allegations. Plus, is Pamela Anderson’s announcement of being Hep C-free inspiring or just gloating? Is there any #HopeForOurDaughters if their activism videos turn out like the one accompanying the Suffragette film marketing campaign? And of course, Starbucks’ antichrist cups, Larry David’s $5000 “Trump’s a racist” heckle on Saturday Night Live, and whether black presidential candidates like Ben Carson are immune from criticism by the mainstream media.

Is publicly quitting Instagram any different than desperately seeking attention on Instagram in the first place? Is there any easy way to handle transsexual high schoolers’ rights regarding locker rooms? And are there any possible Halloween costumes left that won’t offend some hypersensitive douche? Lex Jurgen and Matt Ralston are back after a Halloween bender to talk about these important issues, plus a Stanford student who got dumped and then claimed all sex with her boyfriend was nonconsensual, another sexist all-female movie remake, this time of “Ocean’s Eleven,” Donald Trump on Saturday Night Live, the importance of Latino voters, and why in the hell Angelina Jolie Pitt keeps making movies.

Doesn’t Zooey Deschanel know the whole “celebrities giving their babies weird names” thing is wholly unoriginal at this point? Is the new all-women Ghostbusters movie empowering or sexist? And is Jeb! Bush’s campaign merchandise brilliantly unique or just desperate pandering in attempt to stay relevant? Lex and Matt explore these critical topics as well as unearned pay raises, Ruby Rose’s claim that gender is a spectrum, Police Chief Bratton cooking the crime stats, porn stars who date Charlie Sheen and if they deserve the inevitable disastrous consequences come their way, and whether Ronda Rousey’s attractiveness and your heterosexuality are inversely related.

How in the hell does Taylor Swift keep selling out stadiums and making truckloads of money? Is Amy Schumer a funny comedian, funny for a woman, or just another joke thief? And should Denis Hof kept his mouth shut about Lamar Odom, or would Khloe and the Kardashians have just told everyone about Lammy’s cocaine-laced sex binge at his Nevada brothel anyway? Will Lupardus (@WilliamLupardus) joins Lex Jurgen and Matt Ralston to discuss these vital topics, plus that time Matt went to Paris Hilton’s CD release party in Las Vegas, the science behind the power of prayer, Koko the Gorilla’s kitten request, and whether or not self-proclaimed democratic socialist Bernie Sanders has any chance of winning the presidency over a year from now!